04 .01 .15 41 and Counting

I celebrated a birthday last week. I was lucky enough to be surrounded by my children, my husband and parents. I don’t tend to be a huge celebrator, so festivities were low-key—but I did have my favorite Carvel ice cream cake. The same cake I’ve been enjoying on every birthday since my early 80s roller skating parties.

As I sat there, at 41, devouring an eight year old’s birthday cake, I found myself wondering—when am I going to feel old? Or, at least, older?

I mean, I still sit criss-cross-applesauce and call my mother every day. I have the sweet tooth of a child. And my version of dress-up isn’t too dissimilar from my daughter’s.

At the same time, I realize—I’m far too old to be foolish anymore. Yet, I think I’m far too young to not care. I haven’t earned the kind of blissful indifference of, say, my grandma at 85 years-old. She had a matter-of-factness that I think comes from a lifetime of learning who you are.

What IS this sober, alert age I’m at?

And then it hit me: I think what I actually feel is relief. I’ve lost the angst of youth. My confidence is at a high point. I don’t question my decision making—whether it’s my lunch, my jeans or my parenting. I admire, rather than envy, the beauty of younger women. There’s no room in my heart or mind for the kind of jealousy or self loathing I felt even a decade ago.

With the clutter cleared away, it feels like I can finally begin to really be me. And maybe that’s why I actually feel energized and not “old.” It’s like I’m 25 with a track of time. Because I know how fast it goes. How life seems to go by overnight sometimes. One birthday you’re disco skating to MacArther Park and eating Carvel cake with 20 kids—and the next, you’re blowing out a match because no one can find a candle while your two year-old sings “EE-I-EE-I-O” instead of Happy Birthday.

But I’ll take it.

You know, it was right around my last birthday that I launched BeautyMama. It’s been an unforgettable year. Thanks for being here and helping us both grow.

XO

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I tend to be an extremist when it comes to nail color. I either go really dark or really light. I love a near-black nail in winter as much as I love it in summer against a floaty white dress. And a clean, nude-ish is always refreshing, whether it’s sheer or opaque.

I think this beautiful shade must be speaking to how in-between life and the weather feels right now. Here in New York, I had to pull out my snow boots over the weekend, but today the sun is bright and spring is palpable in the air. This crushed berry really pops against the black wintery coat I can’t believe I’m still wearing—but it’s begging my peep-toe booties to come out and play.

Find the Chanel polish here, or check out similar shades from Zoya and Deborah Lippmann.

 

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I’m headed to Florida for a few days to see my family and defrost my kids.

I actually grew up in Miami. But to be honest, I never liked the weather. I always felt like a creature out of my natural habitat with my big frizzy hair and pale skin. Don’t get me wrong, I like warm weather, I just like a more arid heat. It must be genetic or something. Because my people are from very cold places. Humidity makes all my five senses cringe. It puts me in a bad mood and my hair in a spiral.

Not this time.

This time I’m glossed and ready. Here’s my defense, head to toe.

Hair
I got a gloss and a blowout the day before my trip. Anyone can get a gloss, a subtle color gloss or a clear one. A gloss adds major shine and really clamps down the cuticle, which is key for blocking moisture.

Before my blowout, my stylist used this anti-frizz Kerastase spray I’ve heard great things about.

Body
I went in for a full-body St. Tropez self-tanning treatment the day before I left. I swear the layer of color gives me an added boost of sun protection under my SPF. Plus, I am less apt to scare people at the pool.

Face
I intend to use Bare Mineral makeup exclusively because I find it “sweats” well. Plus, it absorbs oil. Win-win since I tend to be both sweaty and oily in humidity.

At the end of the day, if all my defenses fail in the dampening powers of the weather, I’ll have my new favorite hat from Lola.

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Whenever I have an evening event that might invite more dramatic makeup, I do two things to up my game: apply false lashes and use a foundation with more coverage than my favorite BB cream or more natural looking go-to Bare Minerals liquid or gel.

It’s usually my Tom Ford Traceless Foundation stick.

So last week when I had an actual gala to attend, I panicked when I discovered that my beloved Tom Ford was old and dry. And probably full of germs or microbes or whatever skeevy thing happens to makeup that’s been hanging around too long.

And then, in one of those rare moments when the world actually makes sense, I found myself in a Soul Cycle class (outside my usual schedule and location—totally in an effort to de-bloat for the defining dress I’d be wearing) taught by one of my favorite instructors, who also happens to be a fierce makeup artist.

When I asked Daniel after class what his favorite foundation for fuller coverage was, he did not hesitate. He even knew what color I’d wear—and we both knew Sephora was around the corner so giddiness ensued.

What struck me most about this Urban Decay Naked Skin liquid foundation is not it’s totally unreal texture, it’s truly buildable coverage or the fact that it’s loaded with peptides and antioxidants, among other stellar skin enhancers. What’s so striking about this truly weightless magic liquid is the light it lends to the skin. It  provides coverage but it also brightens with it’s unique light diffusing spheres. (Read: blurred lines. invisible pores.)

Actual luminosity.

LOVE. IT.

Love it more because it’s formulated without parabens, sulfates, synthetic fragrances, phthalates, GMOs or triclosan.

 

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Twenty years ago, Cozy Friedman pioneered the first children’s hair salon in New York City. Part play space, part toy store, Cozy Cuts for Kids is a institution—a rite of passage for a first haircut, a destination for boys and girls to get regularly coiffed while watching their favorite movie. For little ones, there are toy cars, planes and butterflies to sit in, Elmo videos and bubbles— turning a haircut into happy hour. For bigger kids, there are kid-sized salon chairs, countless videos to choose from and a wall of dazzling hair accessories that makes girls swoon. A saunter through the toy aisles might make a haircut cost a little bit more, but believe me, it’s all worth it. And the whole experience is topped off with lollipops and balloons. A visit to Cozy’s is so fun, they do birthday parties.

There is no higher expert on kids’ hair than Cozy Friedman. Last year, she launched SoCozy haircare for kids because she realized there was a huge gap between baby hair care and adult products. And it’s so true. That’s why I was still using “baby” shampoo and conditioner on my seven year-old. As with her brilliant salon idea, Cozy answered another obvious need in the world of kids hair. And if, like me, you’ve ever had to detangle a little girl’s hair while she screams, or attempted to calm down a boy’s morning bed head before school, you, too, realize that the world of kids hair is not to be taken lightly.

Kids Hair Really Is Different

”They” say that a person’s hair texture changes every 7 years and I’m a believer that it’s true. However, baby hair is different than toddler hair which is different from older kid’s hair. It’s not a particular age though that the texture changes. I see kids in my salons that need a haircut at 5 months, whereas some kids don’t need a haircut before turning 4. Every child is different.

That’s Why SoCozy Hair Care Has “No-Nasties”

Definitely, which is the reason why it’s so important to choose products that are specially formulated for kids. Watch out for harmful ingredients. With a little effort, it’s possible to find substitutions that deliver professional results so we’ve made that commitment.  We have a non-negotiable No Nasties policy for our formulas and we’ve even taken that a step further to include no gluten, nuts or wheat.

On Getting Kids To Wash Their Own Hair

The hardest part of getting children into washing their own hair is making it not feel like a chore. Make it a fun activity and be prepared for mishaps. Shampoo will inevitably drip down into their face so keep a wash cloth handy before it drips too much and be sure to use tear-free formulations. In my salons and with my own kids, I’ve noticed that if kids love the fragrance they will actually want to wash their hair.

Different Hair Types, Different Wash Schedules

Out of control frizz: Wash every three to four days to let natural oils build to combat the frizz. Using a hydrating conditioner after you wash keeps hair moisturized and frizz free. Our SoCozy Super Hydrating Conditioner gets the job done in a snap.

Flat flyaways: Wash hair very two to three days and use a quality shampoo and conditioner such as the SoCozy Cinch 2-in-1 or 3-in-1. You want to make sure you don’t weigh hair down with heavy conditioners in an effort to manage the flyaways.

Lice: No one likes to talk about it but lice happens. Many parents don’t realize they can take preventative steps to avoid the pesky critters. Don’t wash your kid’s hair every day. A buildup of natural oils make it harder for lice to attach to the hair shaft. Another tip is to use tea tree oil-based products like SoCozy Boo! Lice Prevention Shampoo and Spray. Use shampoo every other day, and use spray regularly on hair, pillowcases, hoods and hats.

The Key to Tear-Free Tangles

Use a wide-tooth comb and not a brush. For long hair is really important to section hair with clips and spray a detangler while combing. Our Cinch Detangler + Leave-In Conditioner was created specifically with knots and bedhead in mind.

The Right Brush Helps, Too

I just created a brush for SoCozy (launching soon) that has soft padding and coated bristles that’s really gentle and amazing for getting out tangles- which is what it’s all about for kids! Knots and tangles are a big issue so I created the perfect brush with coated bristles and soft padding to make process fast and tear-free – which is what it’s all about with kids.


Boys Have Hair Issues, Too

It’s bedhead. We’ve all seen little boys with crazy bedhead in the morning but it’s an easy problem to solve and it doesn’t take much time at all. For wavy or curly hair I recommend a leave-in conditioner. Just a couple spritzes will calm crazy hair and help re-establish the curl. For fine or straight hair, a light styling cream is all you need to put hair in its place and give a natural hold.

Happy curls = Happy Girls

Of course just like most women girls with curly hair wish it were straight. The trick is learning how to manage the curls without creating frizz. I suggest parents take the time to understand curly hair and teach their daughter how to embrace her curls, rather than trying to disguise them by blowing hair straight. I have really curly hair, and when I was growing up, no one ever told me that you’re not supposed to brush curly hair, because it turns into a giant “frizzball.” Take the time to learn what works and what doesn’t work for your child, everyone will be happy!

Why Kids Look Pretty Normal These Days

Hair trends are pretty traditional at the moment. For girls it’s the fishtail braid and for boys the perfect gentleman’s part. Both are simple and take very little time to do! We have lots of how-to videos that give parents an arsenal of quick and easy hair styles.

Want to learn how to give your daughter a Mermaid Flip Tail or give your son a “Gentleman’s Part?” Check out Cozy’s great how-to video’s and her book, Cozy’s Complete Guide to Girls Hair that’s a complete reference guide for everything from fancy up do’s to everyday favorites.


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I had never even considered getting eyelash extensions. My natural lashes are not too shabby, actually. Especially with great mascara. But one day, I met my beautiful friend A. for lunch and she was all eyes: fluttery, feminine and fabulous. I had to have them. So, in the name of journalism and beauty research for mothers everywhere, I went to JJ Eyelashes in midtown Manhattan to get my fringe on.

The process for the initial set took a little under an hour. Clients lie down on a comfy little bed, and are given blankets and a complimentary ten minute foot massage (heaven). Eyes are gently taped closed while JJ’s exclusively trained aestheticians apply silk and mink lashes with surgical glue and meticulous hands, one by one. I think I actually fell asleep. When I sat up and opened my eyes, I was stunned at the result: natural, long and lush with not even one eyelash out place. I was instantly obsessed.

For over four months, I went back every week or two for a “refill,” which took about 40 minutes. Same bed, same foot massage and same gorgeous result every time. I don’t know how they do it. These women are artists.

The Lowdown: JJ Eyelashes offers ten different lengths of lashes with two different curls and thickness. There are three levels of lash sets, each set more dramatic as the number of lashes per eye goes up. I stuck with the most natural set, the Ruby, at 80 lashes per eye. I chose a round shape, also the most natural, with a mix of thick and thinner lashes. What I love about JJ Eyelashes is that they truly customize each eyelash set to each client.

The Pros: Eyelash extensions saved me time! No mascara necessary (or allowed). This saved me time in the morning as well as when I washed my face at night. I looked more awake and bright eyed with less makeup. I felt prettier.

The Cons: Maintenance, maintenance, maintenance! Some weeks my lashes lasted longer than others. I think it depended upon how my own eyelashes grew, how much I exercised/sweat and how careful I was when showering and rubbing my eyes. In general, the lashes have very good staying power but are susceptible to lifestyle. They must be handled with care.

I knew I would be taking a break from the lashes over the summer because I wouldn’t be in town to keep them up. The big question—and I think the big deterrent for many women to starting the lash process at all—is how much do the natural lashes suffer? I heard all the scary stories of women being left with hardly any lashes and I was pretty panicky when I went in for the removal. But I’m happy to report that my own lashes are well intact. They might be a little less full but there’s certainly not a devastating loss. I think the reality is that you get so used to the look of the extensions that your own lashes seem anemic by comparison and it takes some time to adjust to having a mere mortal’s flutter.

I definitely plan to resume my extensions in the fall.

Perk: If you’re in New York City, JJ Eyelashes is offering a 20% off an initial set to BeautyMama readers.

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